Alecia Brower

There is a lot of talk about achieving a work-life balance. It appears as a near-impossible task, as we often feel as if we are neglecting one area of our lives due to the demands of another. I like to look at the task of “balance” in life as more of attempting to find a rhythm: There will be times when you need to focus on one area more than another, but you hopefully will be able to shift to give your time and energy to other areas soon. I like to think of it almost like double dutch – you are jumping over both ropes, but with different emphasis on whether you are jumping on one foot or the other or both at the same time. However you do it, there must be a rhythm so that the activity is successful. The key to finding that rhythm is becoming aware of what you are doing with your life: are you working in your life, or on your life? 

This world is fast-paced and demanding. At some point, many of us become consumed by the daily grind, constantly working in our lives. This is often an unconscious shift, as we climb the ladder of success, and are swept up in the wave of promotions, paychecks, and achievements, often neglecting the most important aspect of our existence – ourselves. What we don’t realize is this: There is a profound difference between working on your life and working in your life. By shifting our focus from simply existing to actively shaping our lives, we can unlock our true potential and embark on a transformative journey of personal growth.

Working in Your Life: The Daily Grind

In our fast-paced world, it’s easy to get caught up in the daily grind. Working in your life means focusing solely on routine tasks, responsibilities, and obligations. It’s about ticking off to-do lists, completing chores, and meeting deadlines. While necessary for survival, working in your life can leave you feeling stuck in a monotonous cycle, yearning for deeper fulfillment.

Working on Your Life: The Path to Personal Transformation

To break free from the monotony and unlock your true potential, it’s crucial to shift your focus from working in your life to working on your life. This means actively shaping your existence and investing time and energy in personal growth and self-discovery.

Finding a sense of rhythm in your life involves:

1. Reflection: Take a step back to reflect on your goals, aspirations, and values. Understand what truly matters to you and what you want to achieve.
2. Intentional Action: Move beyond dreaming and take deliberate action toward your personal growth. Set goals, acquire new skills, and make promises to yourself that you keep. Progress may come in small steps, but each one brings you closer to the life that you truly desire.
3. Prioritization: Make a conscious effort to allocate your time and energy to the things that truly matter. Strike a balance between your responsibilities and the pursuit of your passions.
4. Patience and Compassion: Remember that personal transformation takes time. Be patient with yourself and embrace self-compassion along the journey. Celebrate your progress and learn from setbacks.

By working on your life, you shift your focus from mere survival to creating the life you genuinely desire. It requires intention, effort, and perseverance, but the rewards are immeasurable. So, how do you start? Here are some tangible steps you can take to work on your life:

1. Set aside dedicated time for self-reflection and goal setting.
2. Invest in personal development through learning and acquiring new skills.
3. Nurture relationships that uplift and support you on your journey.
4. Embrace new experiences and challenges as opportunities for growth.
5. Practice self-care and prioritize activities that bring you joy and fulfillment.

Working on your life is an ongoing process, and it’s never too late to start. Give yourself permission to embrace the incredible possibilities ahead of you. Begin shaping the life you’ve always dreamed of. Finding your rhythm is about aligning your actions with your aspirations and creating a harmonious blend of work, personal growth, and fulfillment. Embrace the transformative power of working on your life and embark on a journey of self-discovery and personal transformation today.

As we observe Mental Health Awareness Month in May, it’s essential to recognize the impact of personal connections on our overall well-being. When we build a strong network, it not only enhances our professional opportunities but it also plays a crucial role in supporting our mental health. So, how can we cultivate a thriving personal and professional circle that positively influences our well-being?

1. Proactive networking for mental well-being: Actively seeking and nurturing connections can significantly benefit our mental health. Meaningful relationships provide emotional support, reduce feelings of isolation, and boost our overall happiness. When we expand our network, we will increase the likelihood of finding individuals who understand and empathize with our experiences. This can foster a sense of belonging and connectedness.
2. Seek diverse perspectives for personal growth: Surrounding ourselves with individuals from diverse backgrounds and experiences exposes us to a variety of perspectives. Engaging with people who challenge our thinking helps broaden our horizons, stimulates personal growth, and encourages self-reflection. These interactions enhance our resilience, adaptability, and problem-solving skills, ultimately bolstering our mental well-being.
3. Mutual support and well-being: Building a strong network involves reciprocity and mutual support. When we actively contribute to others’ well-being by offering assistance, providing resources, or lending a listening ear, we create a supportive environment within our network. This environment encourages open conversations about mental health, reduces stigma, and promotes a culture of care and compassion.
4. Online platforms for mental health advocacy: Digital platforms offer a unique opportunity to advocate for mental health and connect with like-minded individuals. Utilize social media, online communities, and forums to share personal experiences, resources, and uplifting content related to mental health. By leveraging these platforms effectively, we can reach a broader audience, normalize discussions around mental well-being, and provide support to those in need.
5. Networking events with well-being focus: When selecting networking events, prioritize those that incorporate well-being themes or initiatives. These events often provide a platform for discussing mental health openly, fostering meaningful connections with individuals who share similar concerns, and exchanging coping strategies. Attending such events can lead to the discovery of valuable resources, support networks, and potential mentors who prioritize mental well-being.
6. Cherishing existing connections: In the pursuit of expanding our network, let’s not overlook the significance of nurturing existing connections. Regularly connecting with close friends, family, and trusted allies strengthens our support system, boosts our resilience, and promotes positive mental health. Prioritize quality time with loved ones, engage in activities that deepen your bond, and create a sense of security and belonging within your personal circle.

During Mental Health Awareness Month and beyond, let’s recognize that building and maintaining a strong personal and professional network is not only beneficial for our careers but also crucial for our mental well-being. By actively fostering connections, embracing diverse perspectives, offering support, and utilizing digital platforms strategically, we can cultivate a network that promotes positive mental health and contributes to our overall well-being. So, let’s celebrate the power of connection and grow our circles together this May and beyond.

As we enter the month of May, it’s essential to recognize that this month is Mental Health Awareness Month. It’s a time to focus on promoting the importance of mental health and raising awareness about the challenges people face when dealing with mental health issues. For those of us trying to establish a balance between their work and personal life, mental health awareness is even more critical.

We often face immense pressure and stress from our work, which can affect our mental health. It’s essential to take care of your mental health and well-being to maintain a healthy work-life balance. Let’s talk about the importance of mental health awareness and how you can establish a rhythm between the demands of your work and personal life.

The Importance of Mental Health Awareness
Mental health is an essential aspect of our overall well-being. It affects how we think, feel, and behave, and it’s crucial to maintain good mental health to lead a fulfilling life. Mental health awareness is crucial as it helps us understand the importance of taking care of our mental health and how we can seek help when needed.

Mental health awareness also helps to reduce the stigma surrounding mental health issues. Unfortunately, there is a lot of stigma attached to mental health problems, and many people are afraid to seek help because of it. By raising awareness, we can break down these barriers and encourage people to seek the help they need.

Establishing a Rhythm between Work and Personal Life
In the fast pace world we live in, finding a balance between work and personal life can be a challenge. It’s important to establish a rhythm that works for you to avoid burnout and maintain good mental health. Here are some tips to help you find that rhythm:

1. Set boundaries: Set boundaries between your work and personal life. Try to limit or avoid checking your work email or taking work calls outside of work hours.
2. Take breaks: Take breaks throughout the day to help you recharge and refocus. Resist spending long periods of time in front of your computer. Even a short break can help you feel more productive and energized.
3. Practice self-care: Make time for activities that help you relax and recharge, such as exercise, meditation, or spending time with friends and family. Schedule them just as you would any important work obligation.
4. Seek support: Don’t be afraid to seek support when you need it. Whether from a friend, family member, or mental health professional, there is no shame in asking for help.
5. Prioritize: Prioritize your tasks based on their level of importance. Try to tackle the most critical tasks first, so you don’t feel overwhelmed later on.

Mental health awareness is essential, and as we enter Mental Health Awareness Month, it’s vital to recognize its significance. We all often face unique challenges when trying to establish a balance between work and personal life. By following the beforementioned tips , you can help establish a rhythm that works for you and prioritize your mental health and well-being. Remember, seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness, and taking care of your mental health is just as important as taking care of your physical health.

Do you feel stuck and not progressing towards your goals? Maybe you’re struggling with self-doubt or negativity, and it’s holding you back from achieving your full potential. If that sounds familiar, then it’s time to shift your mindset towards growth, positivity, and self-belief. Here are three ways to cultivate these qualities and take your life to the next level:

1.         Embrace Challenges and Learn from Failure

A growth mindset means viewing challenges and setbacks as opportunities for learning and growth. Instead of shying away from difficult tasks or feeling defeated by failure, approach them with curiosity and a willingness to learn. Embrace challenges as a chance to develop new skills, expand your knowledge, and become more resilient.

• Next time you encounter a challenging task or project, approach it with a growth mindset. Take note of what you can learn from the experience, and how you can use that knowledge to improve in the future.

2.         Practice Positive Self-Talk

Your mindset is shaped by the stories you tell yourself. If you constantly focus on your shortcomings and failures, you’ll start to believe that you’re not capable of success. On the other hand, if you practice positive self-talk and remind yourself of your strengths and accomplishments, you’ll feel more confident and motivated to take on new challenges.

• Take time each day to reflect on your positive qualities and accomplishments. Write them down in a journal or say them out loud to yourself. Make positive self-talk a habit and watch how it transforms your mindset.

3.         Continuously Learn and Develop New Skills

Believing in your ability to learn and grow is key to cultivating a growth mindset. Never stop learning or developing new skills, no matter how successful you become. Ongoing learning helps keep you adaptable, open to change, and continuously growing.

• Set a goal to learn a new skill or develop an existing one. Sign up for a course, read a book, or find a mentor to help you improve. Focus on continuous learning and watch how it boosts your confidence and helps you to achieve your goals.

Cultivating a growth mindset, adopting a positive attitude, and believing in your ability to learn and grow are key ingredients to being more successful in work and life. By embracing challenges, practicing positive self-talk, and continuously learning, you can shift your mindset toward growth and unlock your full potential.

Setting intentions is important because it helps you clarify what you want to achieve and why. It allows you to focus your energy and attention on specific goals, making it easier to take action towards them. Here are some reasons why setting intentions can help you be more successful:

1. Provides clarity and focus: By setting intentions, you create a clear picture of what you want to accomplish. This clarity helps you to focus your attention and efforts on what is truly important.
2. Increases motivation: When you have a clear intention, it can motivate you to take action and stay committed to achieving your goals. You are more likely to follow through on tasks and take steps towards your desired outcome.
3. Creates a sense of purpose: Setting intentions gives you a sense of purpose and direction. It helps you to align your actions with your values and priorities, and can give you a greater sense of meaning in your life.
4. Enhances visualization: When you have a clear intention, it can be easier to visualize yourself achieving your goal. This can help you stay motivated and focused on what you want to achieve.
5. Increases self-awareness: By setting intentions, you become more aware of your own desires, strengths, and weaknesses. This self-awareness can help you make better decisions and take actions that align with your goals and values.

Overall, setting intentions helps you to be more focused, motivated, and purposeful, which can lead to greater success in achieving your goals.

Here are three questions and action steps for each reason for intention:

1.Provides clarity and focus:

Questions:

• What do I want to accomplish?
• Why is this goal important to me?
• What steps do I need to take to achieve this goal?

Action Steps:

• Write down your goal and make it as specific and measurable as possible.
• Reflect on why this goal is important to you, and how achieving it will impact your life.
• Break down the goal into smaller, manageable steps, and create a plan of action for each step.

2. Increases motivation:

Questions:

• What motivates me to achieve my goals?
• How can I stay motivated when faced with obstacles or setbacks?
• What rewards can I give myself for achieving my goals?

Action Steps:

• Identify your sources of motivation, whether it’s personal satisfaction, external recognition, or something else.
• Develop strategies to stay motivated when faced with obstacles, such as seeking support from others, taking breaks, or visualizing success.
• Determine how you will reward yourself when you achieve your goals, whether it’s with something tangible or simply taking time to celebrate your success.

3. Creates a sense of purpose

Questions:

• What is important to me in life? This question helps you identify your core values and what truly matters to you. Your values are the foundation of your sense of purpose, so taking the time to clarify them can help you align your intentions with your priorities.
• What do I want to achieve? This question helps you set specific goals that align with your values and priorities. It’s important to be clear and specific about what you want to accomplish so that you can create a plan of action to achieve those goals.
• Why is achieving these goals important to me? This question helps you identify the deeper meaning behind your goals and the purpose they serve in your life. By understanding the why behind your intentions, you can stay motivated and committed to achieving them, even in the face of obstacles and setbacks.

Action Steps:

• Take time to reflect on your values and priorities. What is truly important to you in life? What do you want to achieve and why? Write down your thoughts and use them to set clear intentions for what you want to accomplish.
• Align your actions with your intentions. Once you have set your intentions, take action towards them every day. Make choices and decisions that support your goals and values, and avoid distractions that pull you away from them.
• Stay focused on your sense of purpose. When you encounter obstacles or setbacks, remind yourself of why you are pursuing your goals and what they mean to you. This can help you stay motivated and committed to your intentions, even in the face of challenges.

4. Enhances Visualization

Questions:

• What does success look like for me?
• How can I visualize myself achieving my goals?
• What emotions do I associate with success?

Action Steps:

• Visualize yourself achieving your goal, and try to make the visualization as vivid and detailed as possible.
• Use positive affirmations to reinforce your belief in your ability to achieve your goal.
• Cultivate the emotions associated with success, such as confidence, joy, and gratitude, by practicing mindfulness, gratitude, or other techniques.

5. Increases Self-Awareness

Questions:

• What are my core values and how do they influence my decisions and actions? Understanding your values is key to creating a sense of purpose and aligning your intentions with your priorities.
• What are my strengths and weaknesses? Knowing your strengths can help you leverage them to achieve your goals, while understanding your weaknesses can help you identify areas for growth and development.
• What motivates me and how can I use that motivation to achieve my goals? Understanding your sources of motivation can help you stay committed to your intentions and take action towards your desired outcome.

Action steps:

• Take time for self-reflection. Regularly set aside time to reflect on your thoughts, feelings, and experiences. This can help you gain clarity on your values, strengths, and areas for growth.
• Seek feedback from others. Ask trusted friends, family members, or colleagues for feedback on your strengths and weaknesses. This can help you gain a more well-rounded perspective on yourself.
• Practice mindfulness. Engage in mindfulness practices such as meditation or journaling to help you become more aware of your thoughts and emotions. This can help you better understand your motivations and make decisions that align with your goals and values.

Remember, setting intentions is a practice. It takes time and commitment, but the rewards are well worth it. By setting intentions, you’ll create a clear path to success and cultivate the mindset you need to achieve your goals.

Are you ready to take action and start setting intentions today? I believe in you!

Setting goals is an essential part of personal and professional development. However, merely setting goals isn’t enough. To achieve your goals, you must ensure that they are SMART: Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant, and Time-bound.

SMART goals are designed to help you achieve success in a structured and efficient manner. Today, we’ll discuss the five components of SMART goals and how you can use them to set and achieve your goals.

S = Specific

The first step to setting a SMART goal is to be specific. Instead of setting a vague goal, such as “improve my finances,” be specific about what you want to achieve. For example, “increase my savings by 10% in the next six months.”

Being specific helps you to focus on what you want to achieve and avoid confusion about what constitutes success. It also helps to identify the resources needed to achieve your goal.

M =Measurable:

The second component of SMART goals is measurability. You should be able to measure progress toward your goal so that you can track your success. For example, if your goal is to lose weight, progress can be measured by tracking your weight loss or body fat percentage.

Measuring progress also helps you to identify areas where you may need to adjust your strategy or put in more effort.

A =Attainable:

Your goals should be challenging yet attainable. Setting goals that are too difficult to achieve will lead to frustration and demotivation. Conversely, setting goals that are too easy to achieve may not provide the necessary motivation to accomplish them.

To ensure your goals are attainable, consider your skills, resources, and other factors that may affect your ability to achieve your goal.

R =Relevant:

Your goals should be relevant to your long-term objectives. Setting goals that are not relevant to your overall goals can be a waste of time and effort. Before setting a goal, ensure that it aligns with your long-term objectives.

T =Time-bound:

Finally, your goals should be time-bound. Setting a deadline provides a sense of urgency and helps you to focus on achieving your goal within a specific timeframe. Without a deadline, you may find yourself procrastinating or losing motivation.

Setting SMART goals is an effective way to achieve your personal and professional objectives. By making your goals Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant, and Time-bound, you can create a roadmap to success that keeps you motivated and focused on your long-term goals. So, next time you’re setting a goal, remember to make it SMART!

Welcome to our guide to setting goals!

Setting goals is an important aspect of personal and professional development, as goal-setting provides a clear roadmap for achieving success and fulfillment in your life. Whether you want to start a business, learn a new skill, or improve your health and well-being, setting specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and time-bound (SMART) goals can help you stay focused, motivated, and on track towards achieving your desired outcomes.

One of the main benefits of setting goals is that it helps prioritize your time and resources, as well as channel your efforts toward activities that are most important and meaningful to you. By setting clear and specific goals, you can avoid distractions and decrease procrastination, and progress toward achieving your desired outcomes.

Additionally, setting goals can provide a sense of direction and purpose, which can be particularly helpful during times of uncertainty and transition.Another benefit of setting goals is that it can boost your confidence and self-efficacy. When you set a goal and take action towards achieving it, you demonstrate to yourself and others that you have the skills, resources, and determination to succeed. This can help you develop a sense of mastery and competence, which can translate into other areas of your life and contribute to overall well-being and happiness.

Setting goals is a powerful tool for achieving success and fulfillment in life. By providing a clear roadmap, helping you prioritize your time and resources, and boosting your confidence and self-efficacy, goal-setting can help you live your best life. So, if you haven’t already, take some time to reflect on your personal and professional aspirations, and set SMART goals that will help you achieve them.

Stay tuned for more posts on setting goals and making your dreams a reality!

As I look back on my posting on my site, I realize that it has been a while since I have written. Life often gets in the way of your endeavors, and that is what happened with me.

It’s been a year since I’ve put pen to paper, or in this case, fingers to keyboard. Writing here used to be an essential part of my life, but over the past year, I’ve found myself increasingly unable to make time for it. The reasons are twofold: other obligations and dealing with grief and loss after being a caretaker for loved ones.

A lot has gone on in my life over the past few years. Taking care of family, my career, and my home, left little time for the pursuits that I have here. It’s been a constant balancing act, and unfortunately, writing and posting here was something that fell by the wayside. I’ve been pulled in so many different directions that sitting down to write seemed like an indulgence I couldn’t afford.

But it’s not just a lack of time that has kept me from writing. I’ve also been dealing with grief and loss. Over the past few years, I’ve been a caretaker for several loved ones who have battled cancer. Sadly, many of them lost that battle, the biggest one being my mother, and their passing has left a hole in my heart. It’s been a struggle to find joy in the things that used to bring me happiness, and writing has been no exception.

In many ways, writing has been a lifeline for me. It has been a way to process my emotions, explore my thoughts, and connect with others. But over the past year, it’s been hard to summon the energy and motivation to do so. I initially tried to push through my grief and keep going. But I’ve felt stuck, unable to find the words to express myself.

So why am I writing this now? I suppose it’s a way to break the cycle of silence. It’s a way to acknowledge that writing is still important to me, even if I haven’t been doing it lately. It’s a way to honor the loved ones I’ve lost, by finding a way to keep moving forward. I know that they would want that for me.

Writing is a process, and it’s not always easy. Sometimes it’s messy, sometimes it’s frustrating, and sometimes it’s painful. But it’s also beautiful and rewarding. I know that it helps others. Writing has helped me in so many ways. It’s a way to connect with others, to share our stories, and to make sense of the world around us. And that’s why I’m committing to getting back to writing here. I know that it will be good for me, and I hope that it is helpful for you.

Have you put your career ladder in the right place?

I heard a thought leader talk about positioning your “career ladder” years ago. He brought up a concept that I hadn’t considered until he mentioned it: the fact that your career ladder may be leaning on the wrong building. I remember thinking to myself, “How can that possibly be?”

I mean, we go to school, focus on a major, change the major (sometimes more than once!), graduate, and then go about the work of finding a job in a sector that we are hopefully interested in. Then we go to work.

For many of us, we look up, years later, as we are thinking about our next career move. We have built a reputation, are knowledgeable, experienced, and highly skilled. But as we start to create a plan for the next level of our career, we recognize one thing:

We put our ladder on the wrong building.

What do I mean by this? I mean that as we advance up the ladder, we often get to a place where there is no opportunity to step up to the next rung. The leadership positions above you are stagnant; no one has moved out of a position in years. 

Or, your department or area is designed so that there just are no opportunities for advancement, despite your desire to elevate yourself in the organization.

What can you do at this point? You have established yourself as a leader and now you want to advance into a position that reflects all of your hard work and abilities. 

How do you find your way to the career advancement that you so desperately want? How do you find the success that you seek?

And finally, do you have a coach or mentor to help you develop a plan for your career advancement? If you are not making the progress that you want, then it may be time to seek some help. In order to get what you want, you will have to have support. No one builds success in a vacuum.

Start thinking outside the box (or, off the current ladder). Identify the level that you are working to reach. Then begin to look at opportunities for moving in a parallel direction in order to reach the ultimate position that you want. 

To continue with my ladder/building concept, it may be time to step off of your current ladder, walk across your current building to another one, and continue to build up.

Is there another department in your organization that can offer advancement opportunities that are not available where you are currently? Can you move to another position that will open up your chances to advance? 

If you are thinking that you will have to “start over,” think again. Remember that you bring your experience, education, skillset, mindset and leadership behavior with you. If you make a parallel shift, you most likely will find yourself moving up your career ladder in a short period of time. 

So, what next? Take some time to look up. Look at your current position, and the leadership roles above it. When was the last time someone vacated one of those positions? Has anyone been promoted out of where you are now? How long ago was it? What are the real chances of advancement from where you are currently?

If you want advancement and it doesn’t seem likely from your current position, begin to review and identify possible parallel position moves that you could make. Look at the leadership positions that you aspire to reach. Where did they come from? How did they get there?

So, check your ladder today. Is it leaning on the wrong building? If it is, it’s time to make adjustments and advance.

I hit the wall on Wednesdays.

Are there times when you hit “the wall”? That invisible obstacle that comes up and smacks you down when you least expect it? 

In the Army, you have to complete an obstacle course, which requires you to climb over or traverse a wall. I couldn’t understand why doing this was important, until later, when I found myself crawling over fences and in windows and around other obstacles to get to your target.

I later learned that those kind of obstacles are everywhere, even if they exist in your mind. 

So as I encountered my wall, I needed to figure out what I could do to overcome it. 

Do you have a wall that you hit? An obstacle that trips you up unexpectedly? 

What is it? Where does it exist? When does it happen? 

Take time to become more aware of that obstacle that stands in your way.

Why does it happen?

Sometimes it’s because we are tired, or our minds tell us to just give up, or we just decide that we have had enough

But, deep down we know that we could go farther

I decided that I would develop a plan in place, so when I noticed that the wall was about to get in my way, I would know what to do.

I had to first be aware of what happens and when it happens. I run out of energy. Usually this happens on Wednesday.  

I hit the ground running on Monday, I’m moving and grooving on Tuesday, but then Wednesday comes…and I’m out of gas. I hit the wall.

Instead of getting lost in why this happened I decided to focus on what I could do. I made a plan. I decided that I would get out of bed and work out on Wednesday mornings, no matter what. I decided that I would not dread Wednesdays. 

I started looking out for Wednesdays. I knew that was where my wall existed and I knew that I could conquer it.  

When Wednesday hit, as expected, I would wake up not feeling like doing anything. I didn’t want to get out of bed, I didn’t want to work out, I didn’t want to do any work. I didn’t want to.

But guess what? There are lots of times and lots of days when we don’t want to. But the target is still there, to be achieved. The goal still exists. I don’t want to say that we have to, or we need to, or worst of all, that we should.

We have to remember why we wanted to do this in the first place. We have to remember why. 

And this is the point at which you implement your plan. My plan was to work out no matter how lazy I felt. 

My plan was to complete certain tasks no matter how much I told myself that I didn’t want to. But to do them in shorter increments, instead of trying to sit and tackle a bunch of stuff at a time. Then give myself a break: get up, and go get some fresh air for a few minutes.

So what’s your wall? What is the pattern that leads to your wall? Does it occur on a specific day? Does it happen at a specific time of day?

Start creating a plan. Just a few small steps that you can implement, so that you can start chipping away at that wall. 

You don’t have to try to knock it all the way down the first time. You don’t have to knock it all the way down the second or third time. Or the tenth time. 

But if you work at it, brick by brick, before you know it, the wall will be knocked down, and you will be moving even faster towards your target.